can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
He uses pillows to masturbate.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
false alarm, still single
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize