she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Be still, my beating vagina.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
