I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Randomize
