She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
