Three words: puerto rican gang bang
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
