is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Randomize