garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
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