Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Randomize
