Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Randomize
