I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Randomize
