the new term for farting is butt boxing.
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
