Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Randomize
