just come out here and I will go home with you...
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize