i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Randomize
