am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Randomize
