Got a toothbrush?
Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
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