how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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