So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
