So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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