I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
