O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
did i walk over a car last night?
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize
