so explain again why im purple
no
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
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