once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Randomize
