You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
