how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
