Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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