i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
Randomize
