Having a random hookup so left but love u
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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