Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
