Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
