He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
