i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Randomize
