dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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