we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
