Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I'm sobbing to NWA
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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