he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
