come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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