butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
