We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
