Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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