If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Randomize
