And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
