Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
