i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize