Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
