i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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