Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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