1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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