i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I just gargled with NyQuil
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
