So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Randomize
